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The Complete Calvin and Hobbes: A New Calvin and Hobbes Collection!


The Complete Calvin and Hobbes Great news! The Complete Calvin and Hobbes is published October 4, 2005, containing 3 large hard-cover albums featuring all Calvin and Hobbes cartoons that ever appeared in syndication.

The list price is $150, but it's now available for only $99.00!
The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
New print fully available again!

Welcome, you've come to the place where Calvin and Hobbes® once were honored with a great tribute and fan-site, "Calvin and Hobbes at Martijn's". Unfortunately the copyright owners didn't agree with that and made me shutdown the entire site. The biggest success of the site was the Calvin and Hobbes Strip Search, which received thousands of visitors every single day.

I want to thank for all your visits and nice comments. I've received hundreds of emails because of this shutdown; thanks for all the nice comments! It would take way too much time to reply to all of them, so don't think I don't read them. I've read every single one of them and appreciate your comments.

If you want, you can send me an email as well.

Martijn

For completeness, here's a list of all available Calvin and Hobbes® books, with direct links to buy them.


Calvin and Hobbes


Something Under the Bed is Drooling

The Essential Calvin and Hobbes: A Calvin and Hobbes Treasury

Yukon Ho!


The Calvin and Hobbes Lazy Sunday Book: A Collection of Sunday Calvin and Hobbes Cartoons


Weirdos From Another Planet!


The Authoritative Calvin and Hobbes: A Calvin and Hobbes Treasury


The Revenge of the Baby-Sat


Scientific Progress Goes "Boink"


Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Snow Goons


The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes


The Days are Just Packed


Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat


The Calvin and Hobbes Tenth Anniversary Book


There's Treasure Everywhere


It's A Magical World


Calvin and Hobbes: Sunday Pages 1985-1995


The Complete Calvin and Hobbes
If you want to have all strips, but not all books (i.e. the least amount of books, but have every single strip) then you need to buy this list of books: Of course you could also buy "The Complete Calvin and Hobbes" listed above!

Martijn is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. Calvin and Hobbes is copyright © Bill Watterson and Universal Press Syndicate. Calvin and Hobbes are registered trademarks of Bill Watterson and Universal Press Syndicate.
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Every fervent Calvin and Hobbes reader should know that Bill has written dozens of poems in the Calvin and Hobbes books. Some are collected on this page. It also includes all verses of the treehouse song Calvin has to sing for Hobbes. About the next ones, Bill said: "For some reason, when I watch my cats sleep, poems spring to mind." In the strips, Calvin speaks them when Hobbes is sleeping.

Still and quiet feline form,
In the sun, asleep and warm.
His tail is limp his
Whiskers drooped.
Man, what could make
This cat so pooped?

My tiger, it seems, is running 'round nude.
This fur coat must have him made perspire.
It lies on the floor - should this be construed
As a permanent change of attire?
Perhaps he considers its colors passé,
Or maybe it fit him too snug
Will he want it back? Should I put it away?
Or use it right here as a rug?

Sleeping Hobbes

This tiger is sprawled so still and so flat,
a question arises when glancing thereat.
Is he asleep? To be perfectly frank,
he looks more as if he was creamed by a tank!

How much is that tiger in the window?
The one who does nothing but sleep?
We'll spread him out flat in the rec room
and have a new rug if he's cheap!

Tiger sprawling in the sun!
Fast asleep, his day is done.
Lying here, 'twas warmth he sought.
The sun has made his tummy hot.
One sad fact he overlooked:
His brain is now completely cooked!

Another poem by Bill Watterson, that shows Calvin's view on the way he is raised by his parents.

My mom and dad are not what they seem,
Their dull appearance is part of their scheme.
I know of their plans. I know their techniques.
My parents are outer space alien freaks!

They landed on earth in spaceships humongous.
Posing as grownups, they now walk among us.
My parents deny this, but I know the truth.
They're here to enslave me and spoil my youth.

Early each morning, as the sun rises,
Mom and dad put on their earthling disguises.
I know right away their masks weren't legit.
Their faces are lined - they sag and don't fit.

The earth's gravity makes them sluggish and slow.
They say not to run, wherever I go.
They live by the clock. They're slaves to routines.
They work the year 'round. They're almost machines.

They deny that TV and fried food have much worth.
They cannot be human. They're not of this earth.
I cannot escape their alien gaze,
And they're warping my mind with their alien ways.
For sinister plots, this one is a gem.
They're bringing me up to turn
me into them!

In some strips, Calvin has to sing a song to get into the treehouse. Hobbes has made this song, because he is the one who can get in the tree by climbing it. These are the verses of the song:

Treehouse song Tigers are mean.
Tigers are fierce.
Tigers have teeth
and claws that pierce.
 
Tigers are great,
they can't be beat.
If I was a tiger,
that would be neat.
 
Tigers are nimble
and light on their toes,
my respect for tigers
continually grows.
 
Tigers are perfect,
the e-pit-o-me
of good looks and grace
and quiet dignity.
 
Tigers are great!
They're the toast of the town.
Life's always better
when a tiger's around!

The following 'prayer' is from "Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat". Calvin speaks this, before throwing his snowball. His comment: "I only throw consecrated snowballs".

Calvin with snowball

Oh lovely snowball, packed with care,
smack a head that's unaware!

Then with freezing ice to spare,
melt and soak through underware!

Fly straight and true, hit hard and square!
This, oh snowball, is my prayer.

The following poem was published in the first treasury The Essential Calvin and Hobbes. Bill's comment on the treasuries (from The Tenth Anniversary Book):

"The treasuries reprinted all the cartoons that the annual books had already reprinted from the newspaper, so I named the treasuries The Essential, The Authoritative and The Indispensable Calvin and Hobbes, because the books were obviously none of these things. In an effort to give the treasuries more reason for their existence, I took it upon myself to draw extra stories and poems for them. Books offer considerably more design freedom than newspapers, and I took advantage of the opportunity to paint all the illustrations in watercolor, which permitted various subtleties and effects that I couldn't get in the Sunday strips. Unfortunately, this was an insane amount of extra work on top of the newspaper strip and the other books. Insisting, as I do, that I write and draw everything myself, this extra work kept me in a perpetual deadline panic and it wore me into the ground. This exhausting schedule contributed to the need for a sabbatical several years later."

A NAUSEOUS NOCTURNE
Another night deprived of slumber,
Hours passing without number.
My eyes trace 'round the room. I lay
Dripping sweat and now quite certain
That tonight the final curtain
Drops upon my short life's precious play.
From the darkness, by the closet
Comes a noise, much like a faucet
Makes: a madd'ning drip-drip-dripping sound.
 
It seems some ill-proportioned beast,
Anticipating me deceased,
Is drooling puddles on the ground.
A can of Mace, a forty-five,
Is all I'd need to stay alive.
But no weapon lies within my sight
Oh my gosh! A shadow's creeping.
Ominous and black, it's seeping
Slowly 'cross a moonlit square of light!
 
Suddenly a floorboard creak
Announces the bloodsucking freak
Is here to steal my future years away!
A sulf'rous smell now fills the room
Heralding my imm'nent doom!
A fang gleams in the dark and murky gray!
Oh, blood-red eyes and tentacles!
Throbbing, pulsing ventricles!
Mucus-oozing pores and frightful claws!
 
Worse, in terms of outright scariness,
Are the suckers multifarious
That grab and force you in its mighty jaws!
This disgusting aberration
Of nature needs no motivation
To devour helpless children in their beds
Relishing despairing moans,
It chews kids up and sucks their bones,
And dissolves inside its mouth their li'l heads!
 
I know this 'cause I read it not
Two hours ago, and then I got
The heebie-jeebies and these awful shakes.
My parents swore upon their honor
That I was safe, and not a goner.
I guess tomorrow they'll see their sad mistakes.
In the morning, they'll come in
And say, "What was that awful din
We heard last night? You kept us both from sleep!"
 
Only then will they surmise
The gruesomeness of my demise
And see that my remains are in a heap.
Dad will look at Mom and say,
"Too bad he had to go that way."
And Mom will look at Dad, and nod assent.
Mom will add, "Still, it's fitting,
That as he was this world quitting,
He should leave another mess before he went."
 
They may not mind at first, I know.
They will miss me later, though,
And perhaps admit that they were wrong.
As memories of me grow dim,
They'll say, "We were too strict with him.
We shoud have listened to him all along."
As speedily my end approaches,
I bid a final "buenas noches"
To my best friend here in all the world.
 
Gently snoring, whiskers seeming
To sniff at smells (he must be dreaming),
He lies snuggled in the blankets, curled.
HEY! WAKE UP, YOU STUPID CRETIN!
YOU GONNA SLEEP WHILE I GET EATEN?!
Suddenly the monster know I'm not alone!
There's an animal in bed with me!
An awful beast he did not see!
The monster never would've come if he had known!
 
The monster, in his consternation,
Demonstrates defenestration,
And runs and runs and runs and runs away.
Rid of the pest,
I now can rest,
Thanks to my best friend, who saved the day.